07 May Connecting Orchid Care to Sensitive Children
I have always loved orchids but could never understand how to keep these sensitive plants alive. A few years ago, I was gifted an orchid at a celebration of life ceremony and felt terrible that once again I was unsuccessful with plant care when its roots rotted. So, I started to learn more about them including taking classes and purchasing a variety at festivals. Now I have a dozen orchids and treat them like my little children. As an occupational therapist, I recently started to realize how orchid care is similar to understanding some of the sensitive children I treat. I started to see how their environment can make it harder for them to handle stressful situations just like with orchids.
What is the Orchid Child Theory?
This idea led me to find and learn about the Orchid Child theory created by Dr. Thomas Boyce, an emeritus professor of pediatrics and psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco. He wrote a book called The Orchid and the Dandelions: Why Some Children Struggle and How All Can Thrive. The “Orchid Child” theory suggests highly sensitive children (orchids) thrive, rather than just survive, when provided with specialized, nurturing environments. These children are highly reactive to their surroundings and can flourish with supportive, consistent, and responsive parenting.
Key Connections to Child Development
There are a few key connections linking this theory with child development where dandelion represent the majority of children. Unlike dandelions that thrive in various environments, orchids are sensitive to environmental stress. They need quality care, empathy, and supportive relationships to meet their potential. The development of orchid children is shaped by their nurturing environments just like the plant. They require routines and predictable rituals. Lastly, they thrive through support and can become creative, high-achieving adults.
Applying Orchid Care to Parenting
As a therapist, I often coach parents on how to support their highly sensitive children. Much like orchids, they require special care. First, parents must learn to accept that their child requires different support rather than encouraging them to be tougher. They also must establish consistent, stable, and safe environments where their big emotions are met with patience and the freedom to process frustrations. Lastly, they need to balance their parenting style to allow space for roots to grow without highly controlling the environment, providing good enough care but not necessarily expert care that is too strict.
Like adults, children can also learn a lot about themselves by having the experience of taking care of an orchid. It can encourage them to comprehend their own needs as well as develop skills like taking responsibility and nurturing of other living beings.
Amy Baez is the Founder of Playapy and Creator of the PALS Handwriting Program. She is a pediatric occupational therapist, speaker, and parent educator with over 25 years of experience helping families with child development services and coaching.